Sunday, March 13, 2016

Hooligan's Wake Up: Timbers, Caps make a trade, Bremen players planned to get suspended

Premier League
Norwich City 0-0 Manchester City

Stoke City 1-2 Southampton
(Arnautovic 52')-(Pelle 11', 30')

AFC Bournemouth 3-2 Swansea City
(Gradel 37', King 50', Cook 78')-(Barrow 39', Sigurdsson 62')

Full Premier League Recap

FA Cup- Quarterfinals
Everton 2-0 Chelsea
(Lukaku 77', 82')

Late in this one, Diego Costa decided to channel his inner Luis Suarez and allegedly bit Gareth Barry. There's some debate as to weather teeth actually grabbed flesh, but even coming close to making Barry a human happy meal was enough for Costa to earn his second yellow.

New England Revolution 0-0 DC United

Real Salt Lake 2-1 Seattle Sounders
(Sunny 43', Olave 86')-(Alonso 28')

Montreal Impact 3-0 New York Red Bulls
(Oduro 58', Piatti 71', Jackson-Hamel 90+3')

Colorado Rapids 1-0 LA Galaxy
(Pappa 90+5')

Columbus Crew 1-2 Philadelphia Union
(Kamara 87')-(Pontius 45', 71')

Sporting Kansas City 2-1 Vancouver Whitecaps
(Dwyer 5', Dwyer 41')-(Morales PK 70')

Houston Dynamo 5-0 FC Dallas
(Horst 6', Hedges OG 13', Clark 23', Wenger 27', Bruin 85')

Hannover 96 0-2 FC Koln
(Bittencourt 43', 61')

Borussia Monchengladbach 3-0 Eintracht Frankfurt
(Stindl 36', Raffael 53', Dahoud 79')

SV Darmstadt 98 2-2 FC Augsburg
(Vrancic 12', Wanger 40')-(Feulner 63', Finnbogason PK 90')

Ingolstadt 04 3-3 VfB Stuttgart
(Hartmann 4', Leckie 56', Lezcano 61')-(Kostic 9', Rupp 79', Didavi PK 84')

TSG Hoffenheim 1-0 VfL Wolfsburg
(Kramaric 3')

Bayern Munich 5-0 Werder Bremen
(Alcantara 9', 90' Muller 31', 66', Lewandowski 86')

Werder Bremen had two players suspended for this match and it turns out it was under suspicious circumstances. Captain Clemens Fritz and midfielder Zlatko Junuzovic each intentionally picked up yellow cards in their last match in order to be suspended for this one. They figured they wouldn't see a result against Bayern anyway, so they decided to stay fresh for the upcoming run of matches. They have been fined €20,000 each for their trouble.

La Liga
Barcelona 6-0 Getafe
(Rodriguez OG 8', El Haddadi 19', Neymar 32', Messi 40', Turan 51', 57')

Celta Vigo 1-0 Real Sociedad
(Aspas 16')

Atletico Madrid 3-0 Deportivo La Coruna
(Niguez 18', Griezmann 60', Correa 83')

Rayo Vallecano 1-1 Eibar
(Castro 7')-(Escalante 36')

Serie A
Empoli 1-1 Sampdoria
(Laurini 82')-(Quagliarella 41')

Inter Milan 2-1 Bologna
(Perisic 72', D'Ambrosio 76')-(Brienza 90')

Ligue 1
Lorient 1-1 Olympique Marseille
(Waris 34')-(Isla 46')

Toulouse 4-0 Bordeaux
(Ben Yedder 5', PK 50', Braithwaite PK 86', Trejo 90')

GFC Ajaccio 1-0 Caen
(Boutaib 70')

Bastia 1-2 Lille
(Danic 90+2')-(Boufal 37', Amadou 59')

Montpellier 0-2 Nice
(Germain 61', Plea 76')

Guingamp 2-0 St. Etienne
(Briand 7', Privat 24')

Liga MX
Cruz Azul 1-1 Puebla
(Gimenez 38')-(Alustiza 71')

UANL 0-0 Pumas UNAM

Leon 2-0 Queretaro
(Boselli 72', 83')

Morelia 1-3 Monterrey
(Morales 50')-(Pabon 61', 85', Cardona 77')

Chiapas 1-2 Tijuana
(Canelo 81')-(Hauche 63', Gutierrez 83')

Portland are making a depth move via a trade with their Cascadia rivals, the Vancouver Whitecaps. They have reportedly dealt for Jamaican international forward Darren Mattocks. Mattocks will serve as a backup for Lucas Melano or Dairon Asprilla. At the moment, the Timbers lack a capable backup for each of their wings, meaning an injury would be rather disastrous to their pacy attack. No word on what Portland gave up in the deal.

Today's Matches
Premier League
Aston Villa v. Tottenham- 12pm- NBCSN

FA Cup- Quarterfinals
Arsenal v. Watford- 9:30am- FS1
Manchester United v. West Ham- 12pm- FS1

New York City v. Toronto FC- 5pm- ESPN
San Jose Earthquakes v. Portland Timbers- 7pm- FS1

Bayer Leverkusen v. Hamburg SV- 10:30am- FS2
Borussia Dortmund v. Mainz- 12:30pm- FS2

La Liga
Levante v. Valencia- 7am
Sevilla v. Villarreal- 11am
Athletic Bilbao v. Real Betis- 1:15pm
Las Palmas v. Real Madrid- 3:30pm- beIN

Serie A
Chievo Verona v. AC Milan- 7:30am
Carpi v. Frosinone- 10am
Fiorentina v. Hellas Verona- 10am
Genoa v. Torino- 10am
Udinese v. AS Roma- 10am- beIN
Lazio v. Atalanta- 3:45pm
Palermo v. Napoli- 3:45pm

Ligue 1
Troyes v. Paris-St. Germain- 9am
Nantes v. Angers- 12pm
Stade Rennes v. Olympique Lyonnais- 4pm

Liga MX
Toluca v. Dorados de Sinaloa- 1pm- Univision Deportes
Guadalajara v. Club America- 9:30pm- Unimas

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